This is a public service announcement to correct yet another account of fake-news out there that is spreading to the masses.
Somehow, a vicious rumor is being passed that there’s some strange connection between highfalutin foods and unique facial hair or piercings. This is not true. While there may be a correlation between quality goods and the striking appearance of service-workers, there is no nefarious, secret connection.
"Just because I choose to have a dapper mustache doesn't mean that I share some secret, intricate handshake that proves my rightful place in some underground gang of high-quality food and immediate access to our off-menu items that none of you normal people know about." Says Brendan Parks.
“Right,” follows up Mercedes Nelson, as she adjusts her equally beautiful and unusual nose-ring, “Just because we both work with obscenely good food stuffs and happen to present ourselves as noticeably awesome doesn’t mean that during the recent total eclipse we all chanted the secret maddening songs of Cthulhu while darkness engulfed the land. You all just hallucinated it.”